Jessica Simpson Wants Boob Reduction

Published: September 06, 2020

Rumours are abound that Jessica Simpson, she of the ever-fluctuating weight is considering getting her sizeable boobs reduced prior to her forthcoming wedding.

In an age where having gigantic hooters regardless of how natural or attractive they appear seems to be de rigeur, it makes a change to hear of someone with a natural pair of big breast bunnies going the other way. Not that she should be considering surgery. The problem or one of the many problems with fake tatters is that they all begin to look the same. Generally, like a pair of flesh-colored grapefruits about to pop. Just look at David Beckham’s shagpiece.

For all the pancake-chested or normal-breast-sized women out there, it would probably seem criminal to have such an operation. But it might come as a surprise to some people that not all women want to have a pair of weighty flesh balloons dangling from their chest like Mariah Carey, who looks like she’s attempting to smuggle two space hoppers across the border into Titland. Some women don’t need sizeable knockers in order to feel feminine or attractive. And many men – not to mention rug munchers - don’t find the one-size-fits-all catalogue-bought tit format attractive either. Some young women seem to think they are some kind of a failure as a female if they don’t parade a giant pair of chest cushions to the outside world, exaggerated by a bra whose application is akin to a vice and then visibility increased with a top cut so low that the wearer needs to have their bikini line waxed to wear it, and carry a permit.

Jessica’s chesticles have always been newsworthy ever since she was thrust in front of camera and began to sing. Actually a devout Christian, her image was more pretty girl-next-door rather than the generic pseudo sordid sexiness expelled on cue by the likes of Madonna, Christina Aguilera and Jennifer Lopez whenever the cameras begin to roll.

The songstress has been affected by the presence of her cleavage as far back as sixth grade when she had to start wearing a bra, whilst friends around her who were skinny and flat-chested seemed more normal. Since the onset of her successful music career she has lived with constant rumors that her breasts were augmented. So it seems that no matter what the girl does – it’s her dumper trucks (and her body) that get the attention. No wonder she’s considering a backward boob job.

Having giant breasts doesn’t suit all women. Some women would appear ridiculous with a humungarack. Not everyone wants to look like the caricature of a garish glamour model plastered across the sticky front cover of an old copy of Razzle.

A source has said that Jessica might postpone her wedding, currently scheduled for November in order to have the operation, that she hopes – apparently – will assist in making her appear smaller.

Much as some celebrities court attention like it is the life force they need in order to continue living, Jessica Simpson is not one of them. The media can be very cruel to celebrities – although sometimes they deserve it. A quick look every day in the newspaper sections, magazines and websites dedicated to ‘reporting’ celebrity ‘news’ and you’ll find countless stories all relating to weight and appearance. It’s no wonder we – or women in particular – are obsessed with nothing else.

We get pictures of celebrities on the beach looking either a) great in a bikini, or b) out of shape, we hear about what so-and-so is wearing, whether someone had Botox or didn’t, how do the stars from [insert crap tv series here] keep their figures, celebrity diets, exercise routines of the stars etc. Someone like Jessica Simpson who very publicly put on some weight was an obvious target for some vitriolic celebrity reporting. Maybe you think she deserves everything she gets having chosen to be in the public eye, but attacking someone for being fat and contributing to the risk of them developing an eating disorder, if she doesn’t already have one, is beyond cruel. Teasing the fat kid in the shower is so fourth grade. Unless it’s the fame-craving likes of Posh Spice or Lady Gaga – whose desperate hunger for attention merits such behaviour.

Leave your tits alone Jessica Simpson. Be who you are and fuck the media.

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Images: girllfash.blogspot.com, johnjohnsaidit.com, jessicasimpson-s.blogspot.com.

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Published September 06, 2020 by Mike in Celebrities
Tags: boob job, breasts, Jessica Simpson, weight