Nigella Lawson is sexier than Lady Gaga but her food is obesity heaven

Published: August 24, 2020

Nigella Lawson, she of TV chef fame and lauded ‘culinary beauty’ has been rated sexier than Lady Gaga by model Lara Stone. Sadly for Lawson that’s not much of an accolade as a bucket of bloody offal and rotten eyeballs is sexier than Lady Gaga (see her meat dress nonsense here); the least talented, most overrated and utterly detestable music industry mannequin.

Yes, Nigella Lawson is a moderately attractive woman but she’s hardly a centrefold pin-up, despite the views of an army of overweight women who regard her as a beacon of comfort for ‘+ sized’ females who love nothing more than a lardy meal washed down with a fat cake. To them of course, as Marilyn Monroe before her, she is a god.

Nigella Lawson looking as glamorous as ever.

Anyone who is curvy and promotes buttery, sugary rich food as being healthy is, by association, fuelling excuses for people to be obese. Some time back British red top comic The Sun (owned by the cretinous Rupert Murdoch – the one who OK’d phone hacking) ran a comparison between Nigella Lawson and genuine health food chef Gillian McKeith who had spent a while in the jungle as part of I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here (read more on reality TV).

You may not have spent time in the wilderness yourself so it’s worth pointing out that the jungle is capable of  making even the most attractive individuals look like something that just about managed to scrape survival through an all out nuclear attack only to lose most of their teeth and hair while turning their skin to a leathery, sagging parchment, a bit like Tom Cruise’s arse. The jungle wasn’t kind to Gillian McKeith.

Gillian McKeith looking terrible in the jungle.

The Sun in their infinite wisdom took it upon themselves to pit Nigella Lawson’s unhealthy meat fuelled diet against McKeith’s healthier vegetarian diet by comparing the two women in picture format – Lawson in a designer outfit, fully made up by a professional make-up artist and of course photoshopped for good measure, while McKeith was shown in Jungle format.

Hardly a fair comparison there, but then again, when were The Sun ever fair?

The point is that Lawson’s style of cooking is aimed at middle class toffs who love nothing more than a bit of posh nosh, while her visual style is intended to arouse other appetites (mainly men of a certain age whose wives no longer consider them useful in the bedroom and who in turn think of their wives as a hindrance to them shagging 16-year-olds, because despite them being overweight, middle aged, balding and boring, they still have ‘it’).

In your dreams fat boy.

She is an advocate of rich foods, the kind which cause obesity and in an age when there is a war against a lying pharmaceutical industry and food companies who continue to promote unhealthy and ultimately damaging products, perhaps the limelight should shine on chefs like Gillian McKeith, Ani Phyo and Jamie Oliver who are trying their utmost to change the way people look at food for the better, instead of selling themselves on how good they look in some unnecessary designer tat while swanning about the kitchen trying to come across as sexy in it.

Your opinion is valuable to us so please leave a comment about obesity, Lady Gaga the dickhead or ponsey TV chef Nigella Lawson.

Read about all or nothing dieting which leads to eating disorders, Jamie Oliver’s food revolution, Jake Gyllenhaal promoting edible schoolyard and a detox for a new you.


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Published August 24, 2020 by in Celebrities
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